Back here again

it’s the worst when I’m lonely. Sitting in my dark room, computer screen blaring, sad music softly whispering in the background while I watch snapchats of my screaming friends having another night of fun, joy and excitement. Why do I not feel these things anymore? Why are the only feelings I feel is either sadness or just plain empty. I’m frustrated at myself because I’m losing the people who I love most. I’m no longer the cool fun friend but now the girl who always overthinks, who always seem dull, who’s mind is in another world. How do I escape this feeling I’m trapped at the bottom of a cold dark pit and I’ve been trying to claw my way up. Sometimes I feel like I can see the light but then i slip, falling further and further than ever before.

What did I do to feel this way. Is this some kind of cruel karma? I’m done. I’ve fought it, I’ve let it consume me whole nothing works.

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